From euthanasia to butterfly

“I really like that about you” said my friend, “you can be so profound but at the same time you can deal with things in life in a really light-hearted way”. The reason for my friend describing me this way was my reaction to a spoken message she left on Whatsapp about seeing the urn of a loved-one when visiting relatives. “It was so big” she said and somewhat apologetic she wondered whether it would bother me that she would talk about something like that. A smile adorned my face when I spoke into my phone, my finger holding the speech button in Whatsapp …”My father and mother used to go for a walk in a beautiful forest and moor area near our home town of Arnhem in The Netherlands. When my mother ‘prepared’ herself to die she expressed the wish to have her ashes scattered on the moor. ALS, a progressive, neurodegenerative disease, had turned her body into a prison and after careful consideration by various medical doctors, and bearing in mind her very short life expectancy, she was allowed euthanasia. We held her when she peacefully went to the other side. Months later my father told me he had been to the moor to find the right place for her ashes. A white butterfly, totally out of season, kept him company, he explained. ‘She’ was fluttering from tree branch to shrub on the side of the path; staying in front of and close to my dad. Then he came to a crossing; it was the exact spot where my parents always stopped to decide to take a longer or a shorter route back to the car. The butterfly landed on a heath bush and did not move again. My father took it as a sign.

Butterfly mandala

A week later, on a beautiful sunny day in October, we walked the same route both my parents had walked so many times. My dad was carrying a very large cardboard cylinder with my mother’s ashes. We stopped at the crossing. Just when my father opened the cylinder and started shaking it to liberate her ashes a strong breeze came up. He was covered from head to toe with her ashes and although I was standing a couple of metres away, my shoes were covered as well. For a split-second we were in shock to then burst out into laughter. It was so funny and through our tears of laughter and farewell we both felt it was my mother who had made it happen. I was sure she was laughing too and saying… ‘cheer up, I escaped my prison, I am happy!’ To this day, almost 16 years later, I am reminded of that special moment, probably on a weekly basis as white butterflies can be seen throughout the year on the Costa Tropical where I live. It is always a nice feeling, triggering a memory or simply ‘love’ when I say hello to the butterfly with a smile on my face.”
I believe there is more after death, but whether that is true or not doesn’t really matter. What does matter is that you can sooth or even change certain feelings, and this can lead to changing situations, through the power of thought and imagination, through visualisation. This has been scientifically proven. Imagining that the butterfly is a sign from my mother changes my state of mind, it makes me smile, calm and happy. I have been fascinated by visualisation for many years and last year I decided to write a series of books with visualisations which I have combined with images of mandalas that I have created. I feel that creating, colouring or simply focusing on a mandala can take you to a meditative place where visualisation becomes powerful. The series of seven books is called ‘The art of feeling better’ and so far I have published three. ‘ I am feeling better’ , relaxing visualisations to make you feel better, ‘I can forgive’ , relaxing visualisations to help you forgive, let go and create and ‘I feel better with astrology’, star sign visualisations for daily use. They are nice give-away books that can help you focus on a perceived problem and whilst doing the visualisation your energy and/or state of mind around it may change.

You can order the books from amazon, or if you like, order a signed copy directly from me via info@renatevannijen.com

In today's blog I also like to offer you a little present. A free butterfly mandala. Do you want to experience the calming effect of colouring a mandala? Then feel free to download my free-hand butterfly mandala here, print it out and start colouring: www.renatevannijen.com/butterflymandala.pdf

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